Child and adolescent psychologist Dr. Jess P. Shatkin, MD offers eight different ways we -- adults and adolescents -- twist what we see in interactions with others, and, basically end up torturing ourselves in the process.

"Cognitive distortions are exaggerated and unreasonable thoughts that cause us to misperceive reality and then subsequently feel bad. Adults are vulnerable to cognitive distortions and will sometimes feel bad because they think that someone has ignored them. But adults, by virtue of their age and experience, have had more practice in these matters and usually, though not always, have an easier time letting go of small potential insults."

"Unless they get a lot of practice identifying cognitive distortions and learn to challenge these thoughts in a very conscious way (as one would in psychotherapy), adolescents will frequently feel the confusion, irritability, anger, and sadness that distorted thinking can cause."

This shortened list may help you identify with your teen or tween some of the ways in which we let our mind wanderings get in the way of real communication and connection. Read the whole piece here.

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